Marissa's Story
August 4th is a date I won't ever forget; suicide is something when you hear about it, your like, "that's horrible" or "I can't imagine what that family is going through." Still, you never really understand until it is you or your family. Suicide is something you really can't process that easily because usually, it's something you hear about, but when it happens, it's like your whole world kind of just collapses. I can't describe what I was feeling, but all I know is I don't want anyone to feel that way. I keep my scar because it reminds me that the pain that I was feeling wasn't forever, and it reminds me that I am strong for getting through it. Every time I look at that scar, I know I will be okay. Some people might look at it differently than I do; they might just see a scar and think I'm crazy because I tried to commit suicide or just see a simple scar. But for me, it's more than that. I'm not just a girl who tried to commit suicide; I'm a girl who is strong because I got through it, and I'm still here, and I'm so proud of myself. The moral of the story – you are loved and cared for, and you're not alone.
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Mental health is as big a deal for me; if you know me, I talk about it a lot. I am open about it, not that it's easy, but I want people to know that's it's okay to talk about it because it is something we should talk about. If anyone is hurting, I want to be someone, they can come to me, and I can help. Recently I have realized people will take that for granted. People will use your kindness against you. I will never understand why the world is cruel sometimes. But you still have to pick yourself up and push through it no matter how hard it is. I'm strong, and I want to recognize that about myself for a minute. It's almost been a year, and through that year, I have had so many ups and downs. I've had so many experiences I wouldn't have if I would have died that day. It's a hard day but a good one because I'm still here. As it's coming up, I can barely talk about it without crying, but I know I need to talk about it, so here I am.